Review: The Hazel Wood

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The Hazel WoodThe Hazel Wood by Melissa Albert

My rating: 1 of 5 stars

Gday, how you doing? It’s time for me to write about why this book for F*cking Sh*t.

Everything about this book led me to believe it would be this amazing high fantasy.

Also hi Alice’s Mum deserves no love from her daughter, who was clearly been gaslit and abused her entire life.

OH! And let’s talk about Alice. The main character. Aka the worst and most confusing character, I’ve ever read. How is she a full character? How? This book. Was awful.

The writing was so confusing and unsettling.

It made 0 sense 100% of the time.

Everything was ambiguous with loose ends.

Seriously— how was this story pitched? I don’t understand the sequence of events.

I’m so confused and that makes me angry.

This book put me in a book slump for a month.

I hate writing this Trump-esque review, because the author is lovely.

But god damnit.

This book.

I’m hurt. I’ve been misled. I just put up with the worst teen romance and mystery ever, FYI.

This book accomplished nothing except for my distrust to blurbs.

Can I please hire somebody to read “high” fantasy books for me and to let me know if they’re decent???

Also, this book just glorified and shat on rich New York kids and I still don’t understand why????

Like why did any of that have to do with the mystery and the fantasy world?? Oh, I know: it didn’t.

It’s like this book was written by a new author for every chapter, but none of them had agreed what the book was about and so they just pretended to keep writing on.

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